The love you give, yourself…

Hey! If you are reading this, I’m glad you’re here and truly appreciate that you felt in the least compelled to read about anything I have to say. I’ve wanted to drop this blog of some form now for a LONG time and seemed to just never get to it. But, my spirit was compelled today so, here we are! I’m going to dive a little into the topic of confidence and how I really struggled at times/ still do with seeing all that I can be. I finally had a revelation that I’ve been needing so long and I’m so disappointed in myself. After some hard reflecting, I’m so disappointed at how hard I’ve been on myself and really being my own worst critic through my time in graduate school and even up until recently. Imposter Syndrome is so real and I experienced it BAD. I compared myself constantly and unfortunately due to historical and generational trauma I actually let myself believe I wasn’t as smart as many of my counterparts. I assumed that if someone had a “richer” vocabulary than me that somehow by virtue it meant they were smarter. If I wasn’t as versed, then I wouldn’t share my opinion, because I’ll probably sound incompetent. Sometimes I wouldn’t take initiative on a project because I thought of everything I would do wrong instead all that I could do right from simple trial and error. Like, what?! 🤦🏾‍♀️ Honestly, I hate that I allowed myself to feel that way and for so long in my life. I truly had major confidence issues. When I have a kid I swear to affirm and empower my child every moment I get so they know how brilliant and talented they are because I needed that reinforcement so much. I’ll empower their blackness because I refuse to let the world enforce negative stereotypes on who my kid is. I promise I’m going to make a great difference in communities along with mentor and help as many youth as possible because I only got as far I am because the people who always saw my potential. I’m proud of myself today because I’m doing my thing! I absolutely bust my butt ( I chose this instead of the other word, who knows this thing could get big one day) for every accolade on my name. I’m worthy. I’m deserving. I value myself. PERIOD. 🙅🏾‍♀️ I still fall short sometimes, but the road to building true confidence is a marathon and not a sprint. Truly, I hope this vulnerability helps someone! Thanks for coming to my Tae talk. 💡💕 Also, seeing that I just paid $36, just know I plan to be here dropping some more experiences and thoughts. ❤️✨